Hey—I’m Grant, the guy behind OldDogZeroTricks. I’m 57, a British expat living in Japan, teaching English and driving tractors.
I’m not here to sell you life coaching or pretend I’ve figured everything out. I’m here because I’ve spent decades drifting through life, trusting things would work out—and they mostly have, just never the way I expected. Now I’m finally learning to steer while still keeping faith.
If you’re navigating major transitions, questioning whether you’ve wasted time, or trying to find meaning in ordinary work—I’m in it with you. Here’s my story.
Table of Contents
Why I Understand Drift
I started out in Britain working with computers back before the internet was everywhere. A Brian Tracy seminar on achievement lit something up in me. Within a year, I’d quit my job and moved to America to chase a childhood dream: flying helicopters.
I got my licenses in Fort Lauderdale in ’98. The “Airwolf” theme still gives me chills. But dreams don’t always pay the bills. When the money ran out, I had a pilot’s license and no clear path forward.
That’s when I learned something important: sometimes you have to let go of the impressive version of your life and trust what comes next.
The Unexpected Path: When Meaning Finds You
A classified ad reading “Free Rent on Water, Assistance Required” led me to Danny Murphy—a guy in a wheelchair whose spirit was bigger than anyone I’d ever met. Caregiving wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t what I’d imagined when I was sitting in that park in Britain listening to affirmations about achievement.
But it became some of the most purposeful work of my life.
That job led to installing elevators and accessibility equipment for people with disabilities. Danny eventually pursued acting in Hollywood—landed roles in movies like “There’s Something About Mary.” I followed, helped with his promotional work, kept busy with computers.
Here’s what I learned: Meaningful work often finds you when you stop chasing impressive titles. The path that looks like failure from the outside can feel like exactly where you’re supposed to be.
Building a Life as the Outsider in Japan
Things shifted when a Japanese woman—Danny’s former caregiver—showed up with her three-year-old daughter. After hearing my flying stories, she mentioned she hadn’t spoken to her mother in years. Her mom didn’t even know she had a granddaughter.
I handed her my phone. Told her to call right then. Lots of tears. Things got fixed.
By 2004, they’d moved back to Japan and invited me along. I showed up with a suitcase and became the boyfriend, the guy picking up the kid from school, the quiet foreigner building a life in a culture I barely understood.
Teaching English just kind of happened—still doing it today at two schools, talking with people about their lives and dreams. Later I added farm work. Went from flying helicopters to driving tractors, found unexpected peace working in the dirt.
Here’s what I learned: You can build a meaningful life in a place where you’re always the outsider. You can show up every day for people without knowing if it’s leading anywhere. Love doesn’t need guarantees to be real.
When Chapters End: Twenty Years and a Fist Bump
Ten years in, the daughter left for America at 18 to claim her birthright. Her mother and I stayed together another ten years after that. Twenty years total—then she followed her daughter last year with her green card.
A fist bump in the rain. Two decades together, then she was gone.
I’m still here in Japan. Dirt on my boots. Living paycheck-to-paycheck. Teaching kids and adults. Driving tractors. Processing what it means when something that shaped half your life just… ends.
Here’s what I’m learning: Some relationships aren’t meant to last forever—they’re meant to teach you something. The end doesn’t erase the meaning. And you can grieve someone while still being grateful they were part of your journey.
Why I’m Finally Steering
At 57, I’m aware these might be my final chapters. Not trying to be dark—just realistic. Time feels both precious and like there’s still enough of it when you stop fighting everything and start steering more intentionally.
This blog is me finally grabbing the wheel. Combining my old love of computers with my tendency to help people step outside their comfort zones. Channeling the same energy that got me through helicopters, caregiving, teaching, and farming into something more purposeful.
I’m studying Japanese more seriously now. Taking on responsibilities I used to drift around. Building something that might help others while honoring everything that got me here.
What I Write About (And Why)
I write about the stuff I’m living:
- Transitions – Major life changes, relationships ending, figuring out what’s next when the plan falls apart
- Meaning – Finding purpose in ordinary work, questioning whether you’ve wasted time, late-blooming direction
- Balance – Managing grief while moving forward, contentment vs. ambition, being enough when you can’t be everything
- Aging – Accepting you’re running out of time while still believing there’s enough, parents with dementia, bodies that don’t cooperate anymore
I don’t have answers. I have experience in drifting and choosing, losing and continuing, trusting and steering. If that resonates, stick around.
Your Story Matters Too
What’s your journey look like? Where are you drifting? Where are you trying to steer? I’m here, listening, with plenty of scars and enough faith to keep walking.
Grant – OldDogZeroTricks
